Tini Didi just reminded me of Bhabiji's death anniversary....brings all kinds of memories, in fact it was one of my first encounters with a death in the family. I clearly remember that day as I was in Saniwal (Ludhiana), in the flying club....
Dad was able to get hold of somebody in Ludhiana who could pass the message on to me that I needed to come home as Bhabi ji was 'sick' - off course no one comes home if someone is sick...I knew that! But let me not get ahead - by the way, Bhabi ji was Pappa's wife (my tai ji, Mickey virji's mom, but I used to call her Bhabi ji probably because dad used to call her that).
Saniwal is where I got most of my flying - after jerking around Jullunder and Amritsar - and, finally, received my 'solo' as well as the private pilot license. Saniwal is outside the city limits of Ludhiana, right on GT road, towards Delhi - therefore you go back to Ludhiana to catch a train/bus for Delhi. We used to have a favorite dhaba on GT road as our hangout place and that is where I got the news, while eating breakfast/lunch.
A guy came on a scooter asking for me and when told, relayed the message that I needed to go home immediately as Bhabi ji was sick. Delhi is a good 5-6 hour train ride so I left right away, getting a lift on a tempo to Ludhiana - By the time I reached Bhagwan Dass Nagar, it was quite dark and Binny didi was at the gate, seeing off someone. She seemed puzzled seeing me there and wondered how I came to 'know' - At that time I came to know. I guess she was done with crying as her eyes were swollen and dry.
My recollection of the train/bus ride is not that clear but I certainly remember going in circles as to what was the meaning of 'sick' - I had a premonition otherwise but I did not verbalize - the same hope was with me, more so at that time than in dad's case. I didn't have 17 years of western life behind me at that time. Wasn't life simple at that age?
The funeral had already taken place - Bhabi ji was hit by a vehicle right outside the gate the evening prior. Mickey virji was coming back from England - somehow I clearly remember that. I also remember his calm face during the whole ordeal. Off course the Thai meals that followed that event were amazing as the 'cook' from England made us try these soups, with the consistency of water, that were on fire - a very different experience than the sweet and sour soup from the sardar ji's Chinese shop in the punjabi bagh market.
The rest of my time is a blur - I don't remember when I went back to Ludhiana. I guess brain has its own mechanism of erasing every other thing and highlighting that one instance in the whole series of events. I do remember coming back home, especially sitting on the door of the trains, not paying for the tickets, getting off before the station....AND THE REST IS A BLUR.
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Friday, February 02, 2007
My dear Holly, I feel and can realise the agony, the trauma and hollowness, you are facing on the untimely demise of your father. Man cannot do any thing and he is helpless. Man should be thankful of Almighty in every respect by all means. This is the only solution to console or pacify him.
I give here under the 1st Aasht Padhi of 5th Shalok of Sukhmani Sahib
“Das basat ley pachey pavey|| ek basat karan, bikhot gawavey||
Ek bi Na dei, das bi har ley|| tau murha, koho kia karey||
Jis thakur seu, nahi chara|| ta kou kijey, sad namaskara||
Ja ke mun, laga prub meetha||Sarab sookh tahu mun vootha||
Jis jan apna hukam manaya|| Sarab thok, Nanak tini paeya”
Akalpurakh “Who” gives so many comforts/pleasures to a man, he is never grateful to “HIM” and if “HE” does not give one more comfort as needed by him then he tend to annoy with “HIM”
If “HE” does not give one more as required by the man and also snatch away the given comforts/pleasures simultaneously then what he would do? Nothing…. Not…. At all. Man is cripple without any injury/disease before “HIM”.
He must bestow “HIM” day and night. Recite “HIM” around the clock.
A man who always recite and remember “HIM” from the core of his heart then all the comforts/pleasures become the slaves to him but for such person Almighty’s name is supreme. He least bothers for such materialistic things.
When doctor sahib wife died in an accident, on that time I was out of India. I could not attend Antim Ardas.
When Gurcharna bhapa expired, I was at Pune and could not attend Antim Ardas.
Reason my son Janu had met with an accident resulting leg fracture and except me no body was with him.
Ye kalash hameshan mere dil mein rahey gee
I rang up your mom from Rai Pur to know about Kulwant health, three days before his demise. On listening his critical condition, I could not utter a word and I cut off the phone.
On the night of Jappi Mehndi ceremony, I got a phone from Kulwant about 10.30 pm. He was chiding and asking me to reach tomorrow morning by all means. I assured him that I would definitely reach. But I could not go.
KITNA BUDKISMAT HOON.
“Majrooh likh rahey hain Eley-Vafa ka naam
Hum bhi kharhe huey hain gunaah gaar ki tarahn”
“Jo aya so chalsi, ayee apni apni wari”
Every body is standing in the row and is waiting for his turn. No body knows when the invitation will come from “HIS” side.”. HIS” invitation goes to every one on his turn irrespective of his/her age. He is physical fit or not, young or old, free from worldly liabilities or not but one has to obey his order
“Kis se keejey gamey hasti ka Aasad ilaaz (Aasad is Galib nick name)
Shama har rang mein jalti hai saher hone tak”
We have to live till “HIS” last call. We live happy and gay; live in sorrow and grief, live healthy and smart, etc for “HIM” no difference. One must obey his order. “HIS” command is supreme. No mercy appeal will be registered. No President discretion will work out. He has to go.
Was kulwant my friend, cousin, boozing mate or advisor?
I do not know.
It is hard fact that every body always goes behind rich person. He praises and respects that rich man because this is the trend of this cosmetic society (either that rich person helps or not that is secondary issue)
Once I was discussing some thing very serious with Kuwant. He at the spur of the moment warned me that I would not talk about this with any body. To bury this topic once for all. He categorically advised me that I should not talk this even with his wife Surjit. For me, he is the richest man; I had ever met in my life.
“Mein Kandiali Thorh vey Sajna, oogi wich ujarhan,
Jaa o badli baraas gayee Jarhi aa ke wich parhan”
“HE” will not call such person like me who is bush of thorn and is that type of
Cloud, which gives no benefit to any body.
“Mai! Nee mai!
Mein ek shikra yaar banaya
Odey sir tey kalgi
Tey o chog chuginda aaya
Nee mein vaari jaan|
Churi kutan, te o nahi khanda
Onooh dil da Maas khawaeya
Ek oodari esi mari
Oho murh watni naa aeya
Nee mein vaari jaan|
Grief stricken
S.S.Bali
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